It's Not All Sunshine and Rainbows

I have been dealing with my car it has needed several repairs. God is making a way and providing. However, I have been feeling the stress of it all and it feels like an endless story of chaos. After putting several hundred dollars into this car, I came out from work and my car didn't start. I didn't panic, but my initial thought was please don't tell me I have to replace something else. I prayed and just told God I didn't know what to do. So, I picked up my phone to call for help. I called a friend who came to my rescue, again. This friend has been amazing, God surely knew what He was doing when He blessed me with friends. She and her husband came, her husband was hooking up the cables and we started talking. She asked me about my blog and said she was looking for a new one. I haven’t written a new blog in a few weeks. My response was that I have just been dealing with a lot and working. I heard a small whisper say, "You always say that."  It was a conviction of what am I doing during this time of distress. Well, thankfully the problem with the car was something minor and no repairs were needed.

When she asked me about my blog, it was a reality check. I have been waiting for my life to settle down, waiting for the calm. There is a calm before the storm, surely there is a calm after the storm, but is there a calm during the storm?

It's hard being in the middle of a storm, I'm scared, stressed, and frustrated most of the time. Most days I feel like I am holding on by a thread. The last couple of times I was with my friend she used the phrase "woe is me". It is easy to fall into that woe is me mentality, especially when life backs you up into a corner and throws punches left and right. 

I really feel like a monkey's butt when I hear about someone else's storm that is so much worse than mine. One day I was driving and having my "woe is me" moment. I was trying to pull myself together so I could go to work, and I just couldn't this day for some reason. I get to work and I am washing my hands and I'm still struggling and I whisper, "God I can't do this, I need you." and I heard a whisper saying, "Does any of it really matter." So, I started working and I am making a drink and when I look up to hand it to the customer a girl is standing there with the sweetest smile on her face. I could tell she was in the middle of her own storm, probably fighting cancer. Her mom standing behind her smiling, in that same storm with her daughter. The peace on them was passed on to me. I heard that whisper again, "does it really matter".  

It’s not all sunshine and rainbows. Sometimes you are backed into a corner, but God wants us to be still and let Him fight for us. He wants to use us to prove His power and His glory in and through our lives. All we must do is be still and wait for Him. He is fighting our battles.

The Lord will fight for you and you shall hold your peace. Exodus 14:14