A Bad Case of Princess Mentality

I was watching an episode of American Idol and they were putting contestants in a “danger zone”. The contestants that were not picked by America’s votes were in danger of going home. So, those contestants had to fight to stay in the challenge. They had to give it their all to be able to stay in the competition. Much like those contestants, we must fight to stay out of the danger zone and if we happen to find ourselves in the danger zone, we must fight to get out of it. We must fight to stay in the game. The princess mentality always puts us in the danger zone. 

Ten years ago, I found myself at a place where I was hurting, confused, and lacking something in my life. I was running from my past. I needed to heal, needed answers, and needed to know who I was. So, I stepped away from my life, from my family. I realize now that was the biggest mistake of my life because the enemy came in and took over. I put myself and my family in the danger zone. I look back and see where the enemy presented himself. I see the people he used to intervene and take over.  So, I spent the last ten years wandering around in this world alone, trying to find my place. I was trying to be happy, trying to be brave, and trying not to fall apart. I had a bad case of what I call princess mentality. It was telling me that I needed space, that it was all about me and that someone else needed to make me happy, and that someone owed me something. 

When we find ourselves in this place, which we all do, we must realize the danger we are in. It’s a place that is going to make or break us. It is sad to say but nine times out of ten we let it break us. I have experienced it first-hand and seen others go through it.  

I knew someone who had an alcoholic father and he once told me that he did not know how to not be like his father. I simply said, “You just do the opposite.” God reminded me that I need to do the opposite of the princess mentality. Well, here I am pretty much in the same predicament as my friend. I don’t know how not to be stuck in the princess mentality. At first, I could not wrap my mind around that concept. Sometimes we must have someone explain it to us or even draw us a picture. So, I went to talk to my mentor. God had been telling me for weeks that the warrior mentality is the opposite of the princess mentality. I did not know how to shut down the princess mentality and activate the warrior mentality. 

The princess mentality makes it look like someone owes you something. So, we are always looking for our happiness in other people. We want someone else to make us happy, but that happiness can only come from God. The happiness He gives never fades, it picks you up when you are at your lowest moment, and it gets you through your darkest days. The princess mentality is also known as the all about me mentality that keeps us from hearing God. It blocks our purpose, which is exactly where the enemy wants us. That is what this all boils down to. The enemy is out to kill, steal, and destroy and when we are stuck in the princess mentality it leaves an open door for him to wreak havoc in our lives. Often, we feel something is missing and we try doing things on our own when we should be looking to God for what He needs us to do. We must fulfill our purpose. It is the princess mentality that tells us to think about ourselves, we must shut it down. 

I have always been a big fan of fairytale movies with the happily ever after endings.  I always made a big deal out of watching the newest princess movie with my girls as they were growing up, in fact, I still watch the movie Enchanted. It is one of my favorites. It is all sweet and cute until it gets stuck in your head that you have a prince charming that is going to come to rescue you. Sometimes we are the ones that must do the rescuing. We are the ones that must suit up and get ready for battle. It’s a spiritual battle and we must have a warrior mentality. I have spent years fighting and seeing things in the natural, but now I must get up every day and fight the spiritual battle with a warrior mentality. Sometimes the warrior mentality just requires us to be still, pray, and trust God through the process of whatever we are facing. It is the princess mentality that tells us that we need an answer right away and that we can’t sit around and wait for things to happen. It is the princess mentality that tells us that we deserve things differently and we deserve the best. It is the princess mentality that has us looking at things in the natural and therefore we fight in the natural.  

The bible says that we will walk through the valley, it doesn’t say if we feel like it, it doesn’t say we have a choice, it says that we will. Those dark days in the valleys are going to come, we must face them calmly with Christ and in His gracious spirit. In doing so, we will face them fearlessly and He will guide us through. That is the warrior mentality. 

The enemy is out there looking for any opportunity to take us down, therefore we must always have a warrior mentality. The princess mentality is just going to drag us down and it gives the enemy an opportunity to mess with us. 

So, for now, we must set our princess crowns aside and suit up for battle.