I'm Ok

A few months ago I bought a new charm for my bracelet that has the year 2021 on it. I bought it to commemorate the year I saw God’s transformation in my life. Before 2021 I was not ok. I was struggling in every way a person could struggle; mentally, emotionally, and spiritually.

Here I am 2 years later and I can say that I am Ok. I used to wonder why bad things always happen to me? I wondered why am I always struggling with something? The big issue that I would struggle with is feeling like life is so unfair. It’s a selfish mindset of what I call the “princess mentality.” 

The princess mentality would fall upon me when I would start comparing myself to others with thoughts and sometimes spoken words of, “Why do they get to have everything?” and “Why do things come so easy for them?” These mindsets are dangerous territory. They can be debilitating, sucking the life right out of you, and draining you of everything, which is right where the enemy wants us. He wants us weak and broken.

These past couple of weeks have been rough. I’ve been struggling with allergies and it got worse before it got better. I have been struggling with my car. I knew my car was on its last legs. It is by the Grace of God that it has lasted as long as it did. I did not see a way out of the situation with my car. I kept thinking I needed to win the lottery.

Sometimes I daydream about winning the lottery. I think I will buy myself a new car, a nice home and I would help others. Then God reminds me that He has a way. I remember that I am not in this to have all the shiny new things. I am in this for Him, His mission and His glory! It’s not that God doesn’t want us to have shiny new things. He just doesn’t want our focus on them. He wants our focus on Him. As long as our focus is on Him, He will meet our every need. It may not be in the way that we think, but He is faithful. However, if our focus is on the shiny new things we will get stuck in those mindsets and the enemy will have us right where He wants us.

To have God lift you up, rescue you and set you free is amazing. You have a testimony to tell the world about Him. That is worth so much more than winning the lottery. I may never win the lottery and I am ok with that, because either way I know God has me. He will never leave me or forsake me. 

God rescued me in my situation with my car. Someone called me and said I have a car for you. I would say it was out of the blue, which it kind of was but a while back God gave me one of those “already but not yet” moments. God knew all along where my next car was coming from. There was one day that I had really been praying about it all day. I was sitting in bible class and one of the ladies walked in and He told me that I would have her car. It’s not that I didn’t believe Him, but it’s one of those moments that you’re like, “ok God??” And you just put it in the back of your mind. So, when I got the call it was a surprise but not really. God is good. I give Him all the glory. 

I have said these things to you, that in Me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation, but take heart; I have overcome the world. John 16:33